Why Don't We Believe In Ourselves?

Trusting the One Person You Should Trust

There are times when something so honest is said out loud, it's almost as if time stops.

Something that we've all thought to ourselves, but never dare say it, even in a whisper.

And on this day, Nick said something that was so deeply truthful, that I felt it in the pit of my stomach or right at the bottom of my heart.

"If I'm being honest, I have never really believed in myself".

It's like he'd read my mind.

It's like he read all of our minds.

Wait? What? Someone else had struggled to believe in themselves like I did?

Maybe, just maybe, this was something Nick and I shared.

A reason we were connected, even though we'd never really spoken about it.

But what I've learned lately is that most of us are going through very similar things, having similar thoughts, and are often trapped in our own minds.

It got me thinking though - why don't we believe in ourselves?

What happened along the way for us not to back ourselves to win?

I suspect it stems from parents and school, both of which had the right intentions, but often poor execution.

Let's be honest, it's not exactly easy to bring up a child in modern society.

And school is pretty much set up for us to transition ever so nicely into the 9 to 5 grind, where you are basically just a number.

At least we can believe that system works.

But even with that influence, we have the ability to believe and trust in ourselves.

We can break those stories wide apart.

Maybe we just tell the story to ourselves so often, we don't really know any other story.

We also need to take into account, that we're the only one to "turn up to all of our shows".

What I mean is, throughout our life, we've been the one constant, the one person who is in every scene of the show that is our life.

We've witnessed it all, including the "bad" things.

Especially the bad things, the things that make us question ourselves.

Without doubt, starting something new, "the unknown", makes us question ourselves.

But at a job you've been working at for 1+ years for example, you probably feel pretty confident.

You believe you can do the job because after all, you've got 1 year under your belt, and there has been no major failure or problem so far.

But what about the rest of our lives? Is belief and confidence linked to repetition of the same tasks?

Everyday many of us believe in something.

Something bigger than ourselves.

We believe in Gods and religions, Governments and constitutions.

We believe stories passed down to us.

We believe what we're told to believe.

And yet, we won't believe in ourselves.

What I believe then, is that the voice in our heads, and the stories we tell ourselves, are more powerful than anything else.

I also believe that we can become better at believing and trusting ourselves by practicing to do new, difficult things.

And I also believe that by believing in ourselves, the one person we can truly believe in, we can change our lives.

Maybe, finally, we should add ourselves to our circle of trust.

Until next time,

Marco